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All posts for the month January, 2014

The pregnancy bit

Published January 29, 2014 by reachandflexibility

Right and second post. The pregnancy one.

I’m currently 21 weeks and 3 days. I’m still suffering with heartburn and morning sickness even though I had thought it had began to ease off. I realised this morning that it hasn’t. My hips are feeling pretty fucked. I’m struggling to hold my weight up with them at times and I just can not get comfy sitting down. I’ve got a bruise on my hip which is huuuuugeeee. Basically I slammed my weight down on the arm of a seat at college and have left a mark. Owy. I’m also RH Negative and fell on my ass the other day at home. Pup helped and licked my face as I sat on the floor clutching my aching foot. My instant question was, was it bad enough to need the Anti D jab? Now you get this for having a negative blood type. You need it so that your body does not produce antibodies or something. Well I decided it wasn’t that bad. I hadn’t bashed bump, I wasn’t aching anywhere in the midsection or back. Figured I would ignore it and will ask the nurse at my 24 week appointment. Hopefully I’ve done the right thing.

In other news my 20 week appointment was one of the most depressing experiences of my life. I went in expecting to be scanned and was handed a number. I sat down in the waiting area to be told you don’t get scanned at all at 20 weeks and to go wait to be called by a nurse. Well 10 minutes and a lot of anger later I got called for my blood pressure. (Which was now high due to the stress) The nurse ignored the majority of comments I made and seemed more focussed on getting me out of there. Typically they were busy despite it only being 8.45am. I was then told that I would need a blood test and to wait again with my number. A few minutes later I got called by the probably only pleasant experience of the morning. A lovely nurse needed to take my blood and optimistically stabbed in my elbow worrying about my warnings that it would be difficult to get blood from me. It of course didn’t work at all. I recommended my upper arm as this is where has been successful in the past. She uttered that she had never taken blood from there before and called over another pleasant colleague who too had never taken blood from there. They tried though. And with many giggles managed to get the vein and some blood about half way down the tube before it stopped and refused to give anymore. That’s right, the tube. Not even the vial. At this point about 20 minutes had passed and they were giving up. I offered the other arm which nobody has ever got blood from before. The second nurse looks at the back of my hand and goes yep we’ll try here. She stabbed as hard as she fucking could into the back of my hand. They managed a 3/4 of a vial. To note for each of these they used the smaller needles that they normally use on babies. My veins are just that shit. Again I was told to go wait and I would see the OB. Now I’ve never met my OB. It’s guy called John though I know that much. We waited and eventually were called by a small Indian woman. She told us to sit down and I can only assume she was the dr we would be seeing that morning. She asked if I was well, scribbled in my notes and asked if I had any questions. Yeah, where the fuck was the scan I was told I would have? Well she said she could do one for us and dragged us to her rubbish machine. She roughly handled my fat (Yeah, I did notice her lack of gentle manner) and quickly scans me. We ask about gender and she says she can’t tell at all. Barely looks really, says everything seems fine though and within 20 seconds we were done. She asked if I had felt baby moving and I said not really. It’s my first, I’m a larger girl. It will happen though. She scribbles on my notes and says be back in 12 weeks. That’s right I’m not seen at the hospital again until 32 weeks. Looking at my notes she had written “no fetal movement yet” and with a big arrow pointing to it wrote “High BMI” – Well she was fucking tactful. I left the hospital angry and upset and in the most classy way sat with Kim in the Tesco car park crying my eyes out at the experience. A nice day off to relax had been ruined by the professionals that are meant to care about people’s well-being. If you ever plan on having children, don’t bother in Ireland. It’s a frustrating experience.

It got better though. We rang a private clinic here in Cork (Babyscan) and asked if they could do a gender scan for us. It would cost but if it went well would make up for so much that the healthcare system had put us through. 18 months of waiting for a referral, cattle like systems of appointments, dr’s and nurses with just no time for you. They said they’d ring us with an appointment otherwise it would be Wednesday afternoon. Well Saturday afternoon we got a call back that someone had cancelled and would we like their place. We snapped it up and took the 20 minute drive to the clinic. It was quiet, relaxing and all the staff were pleasant. The receptionist couldn’t get my name right but with her accent I didn’t realise until she put it on paper. At that point I didn’t have the heart to correct her. We get called in for our scan after 15 minutes and it’s all smiles and excitement. Me and Kim are happy to announce we’re having a little girl. I have been convinced boy since day 1. I should have known with a family of all girls that a girl was more likely but I didn’t realise. We’re over the moon though. The appointment was exactly what I needed. It wiped out the majority of bad memories from the previous week. We’re having a little baby girl. Don’t know if that will ever lose it’s magic.

We’ve picked our names from before we even got pregnant. Elizabeth Marie. Beth for short. Found out today that a friend had had his little girl and called her Bethan. Was a little peeved that she will technically have the same shortened name we will but I just like to think that our Beth will be cuter, smarter and all those other things that parents believe about their children. Besides the names are family names so we get +1 to the choices already anyways. I’ve also been feeling her move a little more the last few days. Not like kicks or anything but like tickles. It’s difficult to describe but I know it’s her and it happens more and more each day it seems.

My next appointment is at 24 weeks with my local nurse. She’s nice and I’m hoping to god she can give me something for my sickness or I’m not going to make it through the GTT test I need. We’ll see how that goes and I’ll probably report back with all that too.

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Pathfinder and idiots.

Published January 29, 2014 by reachandflexibility

2 posts today. 1 pregnancy and 1 not. Will do the not one first as it’s been bugging me. Is it ok to kill off friend’s characters during role-play? Not as a DM but as another party member.

I’ll give you the situation. 2 reasonably new players playing simple enough characters from the core rulebook. We don’t know all the rules or the spells we just enjoy meeting each week and violently killing mobs and building a story for our characters. Then there is the 3rd member. He likes to think he is an advanced player. He builds characters made up combinations from numerous expansions, grants them combinations of items and spells to make himself strong in one area but totally useless in others. He patronisingly explains the rules when you try to figure something out for yourself. In simple he’s a twat without realising it. Is it fair to let him have his way with a character that has been built to a specific perfection or should he be bought down to the level of the other 2 players?

This is the situation our RP group is currently having with out Pathfinder campaign. I’m playing a sorcerer and the other newbie is playing a cleric. T(wat) has got a fighter. That can not fight. He’s trying to make it into some sort of Game of Thrones dancing swordsman thing (Basically a build he found online) and so far has been completely useless. He never has any health, complains that I hit him with spells when he’s in the way of everything and has more intellect than either of the spell casters purely because of this build he wants to make. Well maybe that suits him that he wants to play something stupid and inconvenience the rest of us but we’re not going with it. The discussion has been raised many times between myself, newbie and DM about T and his builds and whether we could just get him killed off in some way. This isn’t the first time either that he has done something like this. The last build was a fighter in our other campaign. Loads of armour, could barely be hit. Did fuck all damage. The moment my barb came along and hit like a truck I had all combat on me. Luckily I had the health to soak it but he yet again he tried being smart and was completely useless in his role. We’ve tried suggesting the DM view his characters before he agrees on them but you just know that when the game starts little things will pop up to make that character just the little more annoying. So is it right that we kill them off? Is there any logical way to teach someone who thinks they know everything that what they are doing is useless is every way?  Is there a way to punch said person very hard and not cause a drama?

Pregnancy update

Published January 17, 2014 by reachandflexibility

So I’ve been avoiding posting pregnancy related things as 1, a lot of people don’t enjoy hearing about it and 2, not a lot of what I have to say is the lovely joys that others seem to be blogging about. I think it’s about time that I let the world know how I’m feeling at  19 weeks 5 days.

First thing though. Ireland sucks balls for care for pregnant women. I just found at that our 20 week “anomaly” scan is just a quick scan. They won’t do a thorough check like they would in the UK unless you are high risk. Why? Because of funds and the abortion laws over here. An entire country ran on religion still. I shouldn’t moan. I could just leave this place but it’s silly in this day an age to not give people this choice. I saw people as  I don’t believe it’s simply a woman’s choice. It is something that affects a whole family and everyone should be able to have a say. Not my place to judge that though and this isn’t what this is about. I guess I’m annoyed with it because I just want everything to be ok after this long and I don’t want to go through everything just to go through a loss that could have prevented or at least eased somewhat.

Now the update part. I have mostly hated being pregnant. 2 1/2 years and yes I’m grateful. I’m happy to be in this situation but I’m so tired and fed up with it that I would happily sleep through the next 20 weeks without a doubt. The morning sickness of the first few weeks developed into something else after 13 weeks. It was like morning sickness for the lazy. No longer can I sleep through a night without wanting to eat. I have to be up around 6.30/7am because any later my stomach will destroy itself and I’m sick. I’ve tried eating in bed, doesn’t work. I’ve tried eating before bed, doesn’t work. I’ve tried different foods, doesn’t work. Nearly 20 weeks and still suffering. And is it just in the morning? Nope it’s whenever I leave food a little too late. I need to eat every 2 hours or so and a quick nibble of something means nothing. I have to eat a meal to get satisfaction and I WILL be starving very soon after. At this rate I will be a globe. Then there is the acid reflux. Since 10 weeks everything I eat sets it off, this is probably what is causing the sickness. I’m drinking Gaviscon from the bottle to ease it because nothing else does. I’m waking up to 4/5 times a night to pee, something which they promised would ease off by the second trimester. I’m tired constantly and not just from the lack of sleep. I’m worn out, fatigued, exhausted, ka-put… And with that comes the annoying one I’m out of breath pretty much all the time. I walk up the stairs and I have to catch my breath. I’m unfit but jesus not that bad. Again I’m grateful to know this is all normal and there are parts I enjoy. The bump (which is mostly a B bump than the D skinnies have) is a nice change to pancake layers of fat I’ve had in the past. My boobs haven’t really changed apart from becoming firmer. They remind me of a cheap porn star. Kim really doesn’t mind this at all. Buying things is nice as I don’t have to worry about my sizes for them. Except maternity clothes and that will just set me off on my ultimate rage. Why the fuck do designers/shops insist on only making skinny jeans? I’m a large girl, hell I won’t beat around the bush, I’m fat. The last thing people need to see if my tubby waddling ass and legs looking like a poorly butchered set of denim sausages. Designers! Get some fatties and design proper clothes for us ¬¬ Ok…Breath…Buying things is nice. A friend of mine has just got us an N7 Babygro for Wiggly. N7 by the way is my much-loved Mass Effects elite fighting force. I’m looking forward to it arriving and eventually showing off Wiggly in it looking like a bad ass.

Anyways I’ve ranted away and people will probably think I should shut up for those who would be grateful to be in my situation. To them I apologise but for fucks sake pregnancy is not the whole glowing beautiful smugness that everyone makes it out to me. What to Expect, 9 months…Even Junior – You lied to me! You lied!!!